Why Aren’t You Succeeding? – Jerry Fetta
Gary Vaynerchuk says success is binary. You either have it or you don’t. I agree. Because success comes from accumulated action. You either did the action or you didn’t. So many of us at times (including myself) wonder why we aren’t experiencing success. It can seem so elusive, yet we can look around us and see someone who is succeeding at the exact thing we are pursuing. How come they are doing it and we are not? I’ve spent almost a decade of my life looking for the answer to this question. I’ve found the answer and today I am going to share it with you.
The answer is confidence. It’s as simple as that. But in its simplicity, it is actually very complex. I find that these are life’s richest learning experiences. Now what I don’t mean by this is “fake it till you make it”. Don’t fake it till you make it. Just go make it. My explanation is going to come from the root etymology of the word confidence.
The dictionary definition of confidence currently says, “full trust; belief in powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing”. There is a major problem with this definition. It lists the symptoms of confidence, but it does not list the root of confidence. Therefore, etymology is so important. It states the true intention of the word at its root. Con means “with” and “fide” comes from the word “fidelity” and means “trust”. So, confidence literally means “with trust”. So, in order for one to have confidence he must be able to trust himself. What is the root of trust? Honesty and track record. Think about it, if I lie to you are you going to trust me? Nope! And if I have a poor track record that is littered with unfinished projects are you going to trust my work? Nope! So, if I lie to myself and leave projects unfinished for myself do you think I’m going to trust myself? You got it! I’m a goal guy. I always have been. So, my issue was that I used to set these awesome goals and somehow, I’d never end up achieving them. I’m smart, I’m capable, I’ve always been relatively success at just about anything I’ve really shown interest in and so it would rack my brain as to why I would miss my targets and others would achieve the very goal I had set out for.
I finally realized that I would tell myself I was going to do something and then not do it. This single action, no matter where it occurred, was treasonous against myself to the 2nd degree. I was lying and I was also leaving an unfinished cycle of action in my life. The result? Massive amounts of self-doubt. And rightly justified self-doubt too. I mean, how would I treat someone else who continually lied to my face and was unreliable? I’d doubt them at every corner and I wouldn’t believe a word they said.
Do you wake up when you say you’re going to? Do you stick to the workout programs and diet programs you begin? Do you make sure you follow through rather than quitting on yourself and others? If not, this is why you’re struggling with success. As soon as you set a goal, your mind calls bullshit. The last one was a lie, why would this one be any different? So, you must know that going into a goal your mind is not even on your side until it begins to see your level of follow through. You must literally coerce your mind into compliance and then force the actions through to completion in order to even get momentum. Most people think just because they wrote their goal on paper or got an accountability partner that they will be successful. It doesn’t work that way.
So, the problem? You are loaded with self-doubt because you’ve broken trust with yourself so many times by not doing what you say you’ll do and not finishing what you start. The solution? Realize it. Confront these issues and force the doubt out by doing what you say and finishing what you start. And conversely, don’t say something if you don’t intend to do it and don’t start something if you don’t intend to finish it.
The biggest area we all struggle with this in is our finances. This is why I’ve created the nation’s first wealth coaching company. A.G. Capital helps small businesses, families, and individuals confront their financial obstacles and begin taking affirmative action to follow through on financial targets. Our clients see an increase in their income, an increase in their savings rate, and begin multiplying their wealth through passive income as a result of our services. Click here to speak with a Wealth Coach.
Own Your Potential!
Jerry Fetta is a husband, son of Yahweh, Entrepreneur and owner of 5 privately held businesses. Jerry lives in Alaska with his wife and 2 dogs. His no-nonsense approach to business, finances, and life speaks truth and provides clarity to his clients and followers. His personal mission in life is to empower millions of leaders to own their God-given, ultimate potential.